*Sigh*

Seriously.

*S-I-G-H*

So…who’s got the patent on THIS?

Sweet Jesus part the sky! Take me higher Lord!

Sad thing is…I know someone who would ABSOLUTELY do something like this…complete with making it “stereophonic”. Shhhhhhh! LOL

Clearly a case where SOMEBODY ANYBODY shoulda just said NO!

Oooooooooo! Oh no they DIDN’T!!

Happy Friday!

Enjoy your weekend!!

*~* J *~*

I’m sad. Thankful that I have dental insurance once again but mighty sad that my dentist isn’t in my “new” network. I mean, how is the person that referred 90 cajillion people to Dr. E NOT gonna be his patient?!?! I’m thinking about starting a petition or asking my refer-ees to boycott but they just fall out laughing when I broach the subject. *Sigh*

So, in the interest of keeping my mouth looking and smelling fresh, I went in search of a new dentist. (We don’t want any of those “Flavor of Love 3″ incidents. Ya’ll know they told that chick her breath smelled like she had a midget tapdancing on the back of her throat wearing sh*tty shoes! Dang, that is R-O-U-G-H!!).

I get there and have to wait a few minutes. There was a young boy in the x-ray chair and ya’ll know what? He was not having ANY of it. Screaming. Crying. They left the office without having gotten any of it done. I climb into the chair and the dentist takes a li’l look-see. Minor stuff. Mostly. But then…we tripped over into the “dental twilight zone”. She asked me if I wanted to close the two gaps (TWO) in my mouth. Now, I’ve had this mouth all my life. Look at it er’y day. What gap(s)? She hands me a mirror while saying, “Braces will take care of that.” I’m looking at her like maybe she’s been sipping straight fluoride. Um, no. Giving her the side-eye as she suggest some other unnecessary ish. I don’t know about this dentist.

So she wants the prerequisite xrays. Ok. I expected that. BUT her assistant was taking so many, I started laughing and couldn’t stop. The poor child got caught up in the fact that I laughed so much, she started laughing. I asked her when they started taking xrays of individual teeth cause it sure felt like they were doing single shots. Dang.

That brings me to my letter to the ADA - the American Dental Association.

Dear ADA,
Seriously, help me understand this. I don’t have to like it or agree with it but it is paramount that I at least UNDERSTAND it.

Now, when I go into the store to purchase dental/oral products, I am confuzzled (confused AND puzzled!) by the vast array of products. There has to be 200 trajillion brands and flavors of toothpaste (for sensitive teeth, whitening, strengthening, fluoride, with mouthwash, vanilla, mint, cinnamon, bbq, hot sauce…ok I go too far…but then again - maybe so do you!). There have to be 100 kamillion brands and flavors of mouthwaste, rinse and “fiftyleven” types of floss. I’m not mad atcha about that.

So we’ve got all that on aisle 6. We have 4 out of 5 dentists recommended gum, mints, etc.

And yet, no one has paused for even a minute to figure out how to create a mechanism to take dental xrays that don’t hurt?? C’mon on now. Seriously?? Seriously! That crap hurts. Ok. The sharp ends of that contraption cut into your mouth and then the dental assistant has the unmitigated gall to ask you to bite down? No, you bite me. Ugh! You’re telling me that you can’t come up with something less painful? With all the technology in the world today, there’s got to be a better way.

Look, I know you’re a busy organization. I understand that. But um, you know that whole “4 out of 5 dentists” thing? Seems to me like that last dentist, that 1 that’s holding out where the rest of the crew is concerned, that odd-dentist-out has a little free time on his/her hands. I say we give this to him/her and let them run up on some options. What? I’m just saying….

Thank you!

~ J ~

All that and ya’ll know that dentist didn’t even clean my teeth. I was sitting in the chair going, “I know we’re not done”. They were so darn busy trying to work up a payment plan for the “suggested plan of treatment”. Fugg dat. I’m calling my “REAL” dentist and groveling for him to take me back. Hmph!