Over the last few months, I’ve really been trying to get my mindset in the proper gear. To bring my thoughts into alignment with my words, my actions and what it is that my soul truly craves. Some days it’s easy. Some days, it’s tough. And some days…well, some days I just have get up the next day and start all over again

I decided recently that I would eavesdrop. Shhhhh! It’s ok. I’m eavesdropping on the conversations I have with myself, those conversations and/or thoughts I have with and about myself. I’m taking note of what those specific conversations are, what they deal with (money, time, relationships, self-worth, etc) and which occur most often and if they’re triggered by certain people/places or things.

Ironically, someone recently challenged a few people to take note of the 5 convos we have with ourselves most often. When she first said it, I flashed through my mental rolodex of convos-in-my-head.

My first response when THINKING about eaves-dropping on my thoughts? “I need to stop talking to myself!” I had to laugh at that myself!

So here I was telling myself that I needed to stop talking to myself. And as I let that marinate, I realized that talking to myself about myself wasn’t really the issue so NOT talking to myself wasn’t a solution.

I don’t need to STOP talking to myself. I simply need to ELEVATE the conversation. I need to monitor WHAT I say, HOW I say it, WHEN I say it and WHAT leads me to say it.

For example, there’s someone that I want to partner with on a really great personal project. It requires a sizeable outlay of cash on my point. My “old” conversation would be “I don’t have the money for this. Do I really need to spend that kind of money to do this? I can do this on my own.”

My “elevated” conversation is “This matters to me because yada-yada-yada” (insert WHY…a powerful, compelling WHY that will keep me focused and motivated); “Let’s think of ways that I can make this happen.”

The main problem with those conversations I have in my head? They come negative framed — always reminding me of what I don’t have, can’t do, don’t deserve, don’t know, etc. And much too often, those negatively-framed thoughts find their way out of my head, into my actions (or rather my inactivity) and out of my mouth.

None of this is exactly earth-shattering. Yet, there are time we’re so deeply entrenched in the day-to-day stuff of life, we don’t really check in with ourselves to be sure our thinking is on point, that it’s reflective of who we know ourselves to be at our core. We catch ourselves sleepwalking (or in this case “sleep-talking”) again.

They say we teach people how to treat us. Why not start with how I’m treating myself in terms of those loose, go-no-where thoughts? This week, I’m truly going to spend some time focusing on what I’m saying to myself. What I’m thinking. (Words – spoken or not – have energy. I believe that.) Not to chastise myself but simply to be AWARE. From that perspective, I can work on my inner dialogue, and work on my TRANSLATION of those conversations that pull me out of alignment into something more beneficial. Yes, focus on elevating my conversations – both those I have with myself about myself and those I have with others.

I’m going to do some serious eavesdropping on my internal dialogue.

And guess what? I don’t even need permission for a “wi.re.tap”. Ha!

LISTENING to myself…and truly HEARING
*~* MsJayy *~*