**Warning: Long-arse post ahead. Consider yourself warned.**
I’ve been trying to figure out how to capture all the festivities around the high school graduation of “Da Dynasty” since this weekend but a few things knocked me off that path.

Anywho, let’s see how I can capture the highlights of graduation. It was h-o-t. BUT at least the rain that threatened the day held off. Sadly (ha), I didn’t get to sit next to “Uncle Playa” (well, not at the ceremony). And um, let’s see…someone stripped for me. Twice. Oh. And someone else proposed. Three times. Needless to say, I was accused of all manner of witchcraft & whatnot. LOL But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Highlights:

1. “It’s a good day to graduate. I don’t think you heard me – I said IT’S A GOOD DAY TO GRADUATE!!” ~ “Mr. Prez” (D’s best friend, Sr. Class President, co-captain of football team; track star; Mr. Popularity & my “adopted” nephew. Did I tell ya’ll he & his date didn’t make it to Sr. Prom? They were in a car accident on the way there. Imagine me having to tell D & his date that when they came by my Mom’s for a photo opp. What a night. Thankfully they were both ok.)

2. “Aunt Jackie, why is D last?” – Princess So Fabulous. We talk about graduation being done alphabetically. “But why are there 3 sections?” So we talk about “High Honors”, “Honors” and then ‘the rest of ya’ll”. I tell her D missed Honors by 1/10 to which BigBro#4 says, “I missed it by less than that” all smug and whatnot. So I had to remind him that *I* didn’t miss it at all. Why Dude mock me ya’ll? Till I threatened to choke him with my Honor cords. ROFL

3. “Why is D bouncing like he’s on the sideline waiting for his number to be called so he can run onto the field?” ~ Me to er’ybody around me as we waited for my nervous/excited nephew to walk across that stage and grab his diploma.

4. “Aunt Jackie! I told you I was gonna be in line come May! Where’s Granma?” ~ “Big Daddy” (D’s other best friend, fellow football player & “adopted” nephew)

5. “Aunt Jackie! I made it! Where’s Granma?” ~ “Foine” Marcus H. (yep – “adopted” nephew)

6. “Aunt Jackie! We’re partying tonight right? Where’s Granma?” Ms. D (D’s prom date, chronic text messaging partner, BUT NOT his “girlfriend”. Um, you tell me – Dude had a cotton-candy pink vest/tie on prom night. What say you? Girlfriend? Mmm hmm. Me too.)

7. “Aunt Jackie! I did it! Where’s Granma?” ~ M, family friend

8. ALL of D’s close friends graduated with Honors. Me so very proud of all of them.

9. How is it that I can go home and not run into a single classmate? Even on school ground? Even when some of them have children graduating?

10. “Naw Girl - you betta put BOTH arms around me. Hug me like you mean it.” ~ Uncle Playa to yours truly when we finally caught up with D’s Mom/family after the ceremony

11. “You walk like your feet hurt.” – “Uncle Pete” (D’s dad) to me right before we got in the car to go home…and right before he kicked off his own shoes! LOL

12. “Ya’ll not having a cook-out, this is a DINNER” – BigBro#4 as he surveyed the spread at the “gathering”.

13. “But D’s not here yet!” – “Dre” (D’s little brother) when we gathered to say grace before eating. We had to remind him that the graduation ceremony was about his brother but everything AFTER that? Oh, it was strictly about US celebrating US for getting them through that milestone.

14. “Ohmigod! He’s nevah gonna talk to me again!” – D’s sister T, after “Uncle Playa” and I detach it from her ear, remove her texting finger and had a little tag-team interrogation of the young buck she’d been talking to all evening.

15. “Um, you might want to rephrase that or say it where your husband can’t hear it.” – me to Aunt R after BigBro#4 put a hole in the screen on her tent and she told him to “leave a little money on the table to pay for my hole.” Bwwaaaaahhhhaaa

16. “Unca X, why you tryna hold her hand? Why you keep tryna hold her hand?” –“Dre” to “Uncle Playa” who was trying really hard to hold somebody’s hand AND without switching to the non-wedding band wearing hand. *sigh* Makes me wanna holla…

17. “I’ma tell ya right now – I’ll give you the key to the house but I’ll be dayum if you walking anywhere with my sister.” – “Uncle Pete” to “Uncle Playa” who was going to drop something off at my mom’s house while the festivities were going on

18. You know those Visa check-card commercials where everyone’s singing and dancing and all that stops when someone pulls out a check? We had one of those moments when Aunt R & I were talking about them coming to visit me & she wanted to know if they could drink at my house. I laughed (who told those people I don’t drink AT ALL? LOL I don’t get DRUNK but I have a drink on occasion) & said, “No, I drink”. She asked me what I liked and EVERYONE in the house stopped and leaned forward. Ain’t that sad?

Somewhere during the festivities, we brought out the cake and gave folks a chance to give the new graduates some words of wisdom such as:

“Don’t give up.”
“If you feel stuck, call somebody.”
“You’re not a statistic or a stereotype.”
“Don’t stop pushing forward when it gets hard.”
“Life isn’t always fair. Do your best regardless.”
“Don’t let anybody tell you what you cannot do.”
“Show integrity.”
“Enjoy life.”
“Make wise choices.”
“You can do anything you put your mind to.”

“Mr. Prez” decides to give a few words of encouragement to his best friends as they get ready to embark on this new phase in their lives. And then D speaks to all his family/friends. *SIGH* Me lub dem chirren. I ‘clare I do.

So now D’s cutting the cake. I’m not sure what he did but the next thing I know, I hear him say, “I can’t…..” (it had something to do with the cake). How bout BigBro#4 says, “Now didn’t we JUST tell you there’s nothing you can’t do?” Bwwwaaaahhhhhaaaa

Right after that, the graduates left, someone turned up the music and the grown-folk hit the floor. Fun times, fun times. Had so much fun on Saturday, we reconvened Sunday for a fish-fry.

Oh, bout that “stripper”. He’s a compact brother, close-cut hair, a bit on the ‘mocha’ side, head-strong, beautiful smile. He’s 3 I think. Likes to be comfortable when he’s at home so…he stepped out of his shorts. *shrug* Hey, who am I to say he’s wrong?

And the proposals? Caught me WAAAAY off guard. A chocolate-drop of a brother. Big bright smile. Serious thinker. Always observing. D’s little brother…”Dre”. Had to remind li’l dude that for all intents and purposes, I’m HIS “Aunt Jackie” too and so marriage is out of the question. But you gotta give the brother props for his tenacity.

Why did D’s mom call me “Roberta Kelly”? She knows she’s wrong for that!