Hey You!
Did ya miss me? Don’t lie. :O) It’s all good regardless. Thought I’d come rescue my blog from this extended “pregnant pause”. My mind has been in so many different places lately – 98% of them UBER positive, the other 2%? Let’s just say, it’s definitely room for growth.

This past weekend was full of stuff to do – Hampton’s homecoming, Howard’s homecoming, “The Gold Bowl” at VA Union (rumored to be the LAST Gold Bowl…31 years of tradition…*sigh*)… I’ve been to more homecomings at Hampton than most alumni so I skipped it this year. (To my beautiful, wonderful, sassy cousin “Princess Bubbles”, I sowwrry. Me still lub you ‘doe.) My church hosted Sheryl Lee Ralph on Friday and Saturday as she performed her one-woman play, “Sometimes I Cry” regarding HIV/AIDS – primarily it’s impact on women of color. So I opted to attend Saturday’s performance with a group of friends.

POWERFUL. That’s the only way I can describe it.

She came out onto a darkened stage, dressed in black…with black duct-tape across her mouth.

SILENCE.

So many of us suffer in silence. Whether it’s HIV/AIDS, domestic violence, loneliness, depression, debt…you name it.

Silence cannot heal you. Silence cannot save you. Silence can, however, KILL you. It can become a breeding ground for whatever it is that is eating at you to grow, fester, and further infect you - mind, body, soul.

During her play, Ralph morphed into three different women – a 45-yr old female who was once entrepreneur of the year with all it’s glitz and glamour; an 18-yr old female who, while in the foster care system, was abused by various “family” members; and a 68-yr old woman who was widowed after 30+ years of marriage. She gathered stories from many woman as she toured the country and fictionalized the characters. She literally breaths life into each and every one of them so much so that when you LOOK at her “in character”, you don’t see her – you truly see, hear, and feel the character.

If you ever get a chance to see this one-woman play, please – go. Afterwards, she held a short Q&A with members of the audience. Much like any given Sunday (or any day) at my church, the audience was a cross-section of ages, socio-economic statuses, genders, and races. One young lady asked if Ralph finds in her travels that some people don’t know about HIV/AIDS even in this day. Sadly, Sheryl Lee Ralph’s response was YES. As recently as a month ago, she was in a small town in another Southern state, at a church about the size of ours and the turnout was very small. After her performance, one of the church elders came up to thank her and apologize for the small turnout. This lady went on to tell Ralph that they “couldn’t” promote the play, they couldn’t put the information/flyers in people’s hands. When Ralph asked why, she was told “because it has the word ‘HIV’ on it, it has the word ‘AIDS’ on it and people would be offended, thinking you were accusing them of something.”

Wow. Even in this day and age. When she sat down later to do a little research, she discovered that the rate of infection in that town as off the chart.

Someone else asked Ralph if she ever considered tailoring her message more for specific audiences. This sister’s concern (which I didn’t understand…nor did I share) is that based on the fact that many women of color who are most at risk or most impacted are in lower socio-economic categories and they may not feel “comfortable” in the current setting to actually hear this.

OK, remember what I said about my church crossing all those boundaries – age, sex, race, socio-economic status, etc? And remember I said Ralph’s characters spanned those same boundaries? Now you understand why I was a wee bit perplexed.

Now. On to people feeling “comfortable”. My take on it is this: IF YOU CAME TO THIS PLAY AND YOU LEFT FEELING “COMFORTABLE”, YOU CLEARLY LISTENED WITH THE WRONG EARS.

The whole point of the play is that AIDS is strictly equal opportunity though it appears to be hugged up more with women of color these days. The whole point of the play, of all the literature, of all the advocacy is that WE DO NOT HAVE THE LUXURY OF BEING ‘COMFORTABLE’.

Comfort in the face of HIV/AIDS etc. is the biggest lie we could possibly tell ourselves. It is an illusion – smoke and mirrors. It doesn’t exist.

Sheryl Lee Ralph delivered an absolutely powerful performance, packing a lot of information into her 1.5 hour play. She talked about how deadly silence can be, how damaging denial can be. One thing that she said that truly stuck with me is this:

“DON’T LET YOUR DENIAL BE DEEPER THAN YOUR GRAVE.”

POWERFUL.

** If you’ve read my blog before, you know that I often find silence soothing, restoring, a space for contemplation, planning and growth. And yet, I know that there is a type of silence that is truly deadly. We tend to be silent about the wrong things - our pain, our confusion, our hurt….OUR HEALTH. Now is the time to get loud. Sisters, we can’t continue to guard our hearts…and not our health - mental, physical, emotional, spiritual. Our health is a form of WEALTH, a form of currency - don’t let yourself be bankrupted.

Be well. Literarly and figuratively.

LIVE DELICIOUSLY!
LIVE HEALTHY!