Comments on: “GO TO” PARENTS http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/ SOULFULL SOLILOQUIES...SOUL DEEP, SPIRIT WIDE Wed, 07 Jan 2009 02:19:23 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5 By: admin http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1697 admin Sat, 29 Sep 2007 13:58:24 +0000 http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1697 I feel ya Single Ma. That would be hard - knowing your child is grappling with something, has shared it with someone else & you aren't privy to it. I mean, if I picked a "go to" parent, I'd definitely look for someone whose thinking lined up with my own but stil...it's "MY" child. I wonder how many times this guys kids actually went to the "go to" parent vs. their parents vs. keeping it to themselves. Or if the "go to" parents broke the rule and told the parents but swore them to secrecy. Or if they ever advise the child to talk to their parents, and maybe offer to serve as mediator. I've done the mediator thing with a couple of my friends & their kids. WHEW! Talk about a L-O-N-G day. I feel ya Single Ma. That would be hard - knowing your child is grappling with something, has shared it with someone else & you aren’t privy to it. I mean, if I picked a “go to” parent, I’d definitely look for someone whose thinking lined up with my own but stil…it’s “MY” child.

I wonder how many times this guys kids actually went to the “go to” parent vs. their parents vs. keeping it to themselves. Or if the “go to” parents broke the rule and told the parents but swore them to secrecy. Or if they ever advise the child to talk to their parents, and maybe offer to serve as mediator.

I’ve done the mediator thing with a couple of my friends & their kids. WHEW! Talk about a L-O-N-G day.

]]> By: Single Ma http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1696 Single Ma Sat, 29 Sep 2007 13:41:00 +0000 http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1696 Hmm...with a teenager of my own, this sounds like a good idea, but I'm on the fence with 'help them make decisions, etc. and they not ever tell the parents the details of the situation.' On the one hand, I would like my daughter to have another adult to go to if she doesn't feel comfortable talking to me. No matter how good you think you are as a parent, there are some things your children just won't feel comfortable telling you. I'd rather she have the guidance of a trusted adult, instead of making an uninformed, immature decision that will come back to bite us both in the azz later. However, on the hand, I don't know how I would feel if another adult advised my child to do something that I didn't agree with. And I definitely wouldn't like the fact that another adult knows more about my own child than I do. This sounds like an ideal situation and perfect solution, especially during difficult teen years, but I'd have to admire the adult for their own parenting skills and fully trust their opinion and judgment. It could happen, I suppose. Hmm…with a teenager of my own, this sounds like a good idea, but I’m on the fence with ‘help them make decisions, etc. and they not ever tell the parents the details of the situation.’

On the one hand, I would like my daughter to have another adult to go to if she doesn’t feel comfortable talking to me. No matter how good you think you are as a parent, there are some things your children just won’t feel comfortable telling you. I’d rather she have the guidance of a trusted adult, instead of making an uninformed, immature decision that will come back to bite us both in the azz later.

However, on the hand, I don’t know how I would feel if another adult advised my child to do something that I didn’t agree with. And I definitely wouldn’t like the fact that another adult knows more about my own child than I do.

This sounds like an ideal situation and perfect solution, especially during difficult teen years, but I’d have to admire the adult for their own parenting skills and fully trust their opinion and judgment. It could happen, I suppose.

]]> By: admin http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1691 admin Fri, 28 Sep 2007 17:26:59 +0000 http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1691 True - I hadn't even made the connection to Godparents. I think my hangup would be flare-ups of jealousy cause I'd want to know what was shared. True - I hadn’t even made the connection to Godparents. I think my hangup would be flare-ups of jealousy cause I’d want to know what was shared.

]]> By: mysTery http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1689 mysTery Fri, 28 Sep 2007 17:15:33 +0000 http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1689 I would be scared to, but I believe this is what God parents are for. So that would be a yes. I would be scared to, but I believe this is what God parents are for. So that would be a yes.

]]> By: admin http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1676 admin Fri, 28 Sep 2007 01:22:53 +0000 http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1676 That was the only part I saw. 22 partners. That was unreal. That was the only part I saw. 22 partners. That was unreal.

]]> By: CreoleInDC http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1674 CreoleInDC Fri, 28 Sep 2007 01:18:03 +0000 http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1674 That episode disturbed me. When the young girl told her parents what all she'd been up to...I just couldn't deal and left the room. That episode disturbed me. When the young girl told her parents what all she’d been up to…I just couldn’t deal and left the room.

]]> By: admin http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1664 admin Thu, 27 Sep 2007 13:27:06 +0000 http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1664 I thought it was interesting myself, especially the "Go To" parent not having to tell them what the situation was. I guess it would defeat the purpose if they did tell though. I understand wanting your child to come to you no matter what yet I think of the peace of mind having this "go to" parent or "village" can bring. I love knowing that my "kids" have someone whose willing to stand in the gap for them. I thought it was interesting myself, especially the “Go To” parent not having to tell them what the situation was. I guess it would defeat the purpose if they did tell though. I understand wanting your child to come to you no matter what yet I think of the peace of mind having this “go to” parent or “village” can bring. I love knowing that my “kids” have someone whose willing to stand in the gap for them.

]]> By: unknowndiva http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1662 unknowndiva Thu, 27 Sep 2007 13:02:34 +0000 http://jackieyoungwrites.com/2007/09/27/go-to-parents/#comment-1662 i think i would have to allow this because it already looks like her grandmother will be that person. i wouldn't like it because i want to feel that my daughter can talk to me about anything but i do underrstand how difficult that can be. well, she's only three now so hopefully i can instill that trust in her so that she doesn't have to turn to others in ANY situation. interesting concept...thanks for sharing. i think i would have to allow this because it already looks like her grandmother will be that person. i wouldn’t like it because i want to feel that my daughter can talk to me about anything but i do underrstand how difficult that can be. well, she’s only three now so hopefully i can instill that trust in her so that she doesn’t have to turn to others in ANY situation.
interesting concept…thanks for sharing.

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